How To Get Your Child To Respect You

By Felicity Baker

It is something we all want and certainly is something we all deserve. As parents it is something we certainly expect from our kids. And honestly I have seen parents getting quite upset when they don't. But what if we are missing the most important piece of the puzzle. Something which could guarantee continual respect from your kids.

Have you seen a child or perhaps know one yourself who is respectful to certain adults all the time. Yet when they interact with another adult, respect seems to go out the door faster than you can say the word respect? Have you ever wondered if there is for a reason for it?

About a month ago I read a tweet from a teenage girl. As I was looking for something else, I managed to stumble across it. Within this particular tweet the teenage girl managed to put her finger on the problem and indeed the solution. Rather impressive for only 140 characters!

While I can't remember exactly what she said I do remember the gist of it. She asked a simple question: How can my parents expect me to respect them when they don't stop yelling at me?

You may be thinking "typical teenager". While I have no idea what her relationship with her parents is like, there is the key to getting your children and teenagers to respect you.

Respect is earned.

Put bluntly there is no way in heaven your children are going to respect you if you don't respect them first. You could be saying but I'm the parent they should, they must respect me, no matter what. Really? If every time your child makes a mistake, you start yelling at them, they won't respect you. Period.

A little while ago I was helping a grandparent who was furious with her grandson. You see he had called her a liar. But it didn't stop there, she also called him a liar. Who was right and who was wrong? Honestly it doesn't matter. From their own perspective each of them were right. The grandmother however was absolutely appalled to be called such a thing, even though she saw no problem with calling her grandchild one. Talk about double standards!

Our children and indeed our grandchildren can smell when someone is being fake or unauthentic a mile off. If you say one thing and then act in a different way they won't buy it. If you truly want your children and teenagers to respect you then it must start with respecting them first. They learn their patterns of behaviour and habits from us and that includes treating you and others with respect.

Of course we can't give respect unless we respect ourselves first. We can't give anything we don't have. So the big question is do you respect yourself? In my experience I have found when people respect themselves they truly respect others too. What a wonderful gift you can give your kids, for them to learn how to respect themselves.

So next time something happens, instead of yelling, swearing, hitting or anything else. Stop. Breathe. And ask yourself this simple question... how would I like to be treated in this situation. Then act from that. You will be amazed at what happens.

By the time your child gets to being a teenager, they will treat you the same way they are treated. So doesn't it make sense to start treating them with respect from the start?

Felicity Baker is a mindset expert, author and speaker who specialises in empowering children and the child within us all. Her website Joyful Horizons for Kids is the #1 Single Resource For Parents On Creating Strong and Positive Self-Esteem In Their Kids Today and In The Future. Felicity's "NO THEORY ONLY" philosophy means that everything she recommends has already been "tested" with her own children and the results are positive and proven. Felicity herself lived with clinical anxiety since she was aged 5. After 30 years of living with non-existent self-esteem and negative self-belief her own life was almost literally destroyed, when she found herself in a hospital emergency ward unable to swallow anything including her own saliva. She has lived on both sides of the fence and understands the importance of having high self-esteem and how it effects every area of our lives. Today she helps parents create a brighter future for their kids and help them create their own phenomenal family.

For a FREE Video Series on Building Your Child's Self-Esteem visit http://joyfulhorizonsforkids.com/freevideo

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